jessica-faye

To ask this question is an important part of not only parenting as well as self growth. As humans we should aim for personal growth and a way of gauging this is to simply ask yourself questions that cause reflection. It’s important to remember that most of the things we learn are no doubt learnt by our parents, our grandparents are friends’ parents and so on. Some of these traits are not always viewed as helpful in the raising of a child, but life should not be seen though a narrow scope if the goal is to grow. To grow is to expand and thus means to allow yourself to see different methods from different points of view.

Becoming A Parent Does Not Mean You Have All the Answers!

Most parents soon realize that they grow with their kids because of their kids so of course the way we parent has to change as our kids change and as our life changes. It would be unnatural to attempt to stay stuck in the same mindset throughout your kids whole life. Consistency is still possible within change which is a core factor to which our kids maintain a since of knowing and trust in their parents. Throughout the years of watching my kids grow and change I can honestly say that it has always taken me a while to catch up to the changes they are going through because it happens right under yours nose and I think we get so used to the person they were for so long that when we realize they are changing we as parents go through stages of acceptance and understanding that are never easy. Now of course we know in the back of our minds that these changes will come, but it is different in every child so the details of the change is what we have to adjust to. Their favorite color is no longer red and you weren’t aware of this until after you bought them a new red lunchbox; their no longer into wild animals even though you have tickets to a zoo for a vacation. We are caught off guard by these new behaviors and can often cause us to become defensive in our reactions. It can make us question ourselves and how well do we know our kids or do we pay enough attention to them as they change. I think is a two way street as to how we manage the stages our kids go through and keep in mind that they are having to accept the changes that we as adults also go through.

Life is different for everyone and no one is perfect. Being a parent is not a responsibility to never mess up. Being a parent is a life time of change and if you are asking yourself if you are doing a good job or not means that you care about the way your child is learning and grow from you. It is good to reflect on the changes you and your child go through and to ask questions. Ask your child themselves what they think and feel about some of the ways you handle things and be willing to listen as well as to correct if they are just not seeing something in the way it is intended. Being a good parent is just a point of perspective and can change from day to day and it is important to remember that your kids input should be just as important as your input. While you as the parent will always have the final say it is a team effort in raising your kids and is a daily effort on both ends.

Keep an open mind to their difference

Remember nothing stays the same forever

Listen to them and consider their perspective

Learn when to hold on and when to let go

Love them through it all even the bad

Having trust in yourself will help guide you in the direction that is best for you and your child

Being a good parent is allowing yourself the grace to not be perfect and loving your child enough to see them without judgement and guide them in truth not standards.

Enjoy as many moments with them as often as possible…

-JCC
March 2026